Being ambitious kills....

I'm going crazy wanting to do a milion things at the same time. Starting this year, I had set goals of wanting to keep up with the lectures as the semester progresses. Better yet, I wanted to have the time to prepare ahead of lectures, or at least read up on previous notes before attending the relevant lecture. Ideally, revise the previous year's notes because I had forgotten most of it, and read additional material to supplement the lack of practical experience. But what I found out was that, what the lecturer covered in an hour's time, I spend triple of that amount of time trying to understand while going through it. There are only so many hours in one night, and while I am already not doing anything else but study other than preparing meals, there is only so much I can do.

What to do!?!?!?!? Sacrifice quality for quantity? Sacrifice preparing ahead for revising notes of the day itself? Sacrifice detail for a broad overview?

Then I tell myself.. maybe I am just not studying efficiently enough.. n I suspect this is true. What is scary is that I am sleeping my standard usual hours and yet, I struggle to keep my eyes open at lectures. I look forward to going home each day knowing that at last, I have some hours ahead to read and understand what I wasn't able to comprehend in the day. So NERDY.

Tired of feeling that I shouldn't feel stressed but I still do. Knowing that I shouldn't complain but not having the energy to act like it doesn't bother me.

Like this how to cope under future pressure? *shake head*. I need some time to think things through. Need to re-evaluate what's really necessary and what's not...